Emmerdale legend ‘lost sense of identity’ amid show exit after 16 years
One of Emmerdale’s most beloved stars has opened up about the emotional toll of leaving the soap after 16 years, admitting her departure left her struggling with a loss of identity and marking one of the most challenging transitions of her life. In a candid and heartfelt reflection, the actress — who played Leyla Harding for nearly two decades — has shared the profound impact of stepping away from a role that became more than a job: it became her life. femalefirst.co.uk
For many soap actors, long‑term roles become deeply woven into their sense of self. But few experiences highlight this more than that of Roxy Shahidi, who portrayed Leyla Harding on Emmerdale from 2008 to 2011 and again from 2013 until her character’s dramatic death in early 2025. Over the course of her tenure — spanning nearly 17 years of screen time, storylines, and relationships — Leyla became one of the show’s most recognisable and cherished faces. femalefirst.co.uk
Leyla’s exit came in a shock storyline when she was killed in a brutal limousine crash in February 2025 — a dramatic twist that shocked viewers and left Walford reeling. The crash was one of Emmerdale’s biggest stunts of the year, with Leyla’s death unfolding in tense, emotional scenes as the vehicle plunged into icy water and efforts to save her ultimately failed. This dramatic send‑off was the culmination of years of character development, but it also marked the end of an era for the actress who played her. femalefirst.co.uk
Leaving Emmerdale was far from easy for Roxy. In a series of messages shared with fans on social media, she explained how much she struggled with the transition — not just professionally, but personally. She admitted that Leyla had become more than a role; she had become a part of who she was. Roxy wrote that playing Leyla “wasn’t just a job; she was a huge part of my identity,” confessing that there were times when she felt she had spent “more time being her than being myself.” femalefirst.co.uk
This loss of identity is a challenge many actors face when leaving long‑term roles, but Roxy’s openness about it has resonated strongly with fans and colleagues alike. In her reflection, she described the initial months after her exit as a period of grief, loss, and uncertainty. Walking away from a character who had been part of her life for so long meant saying goodbye not only to a job, but to a daily routine, a close‑knit community, and a creative home. femalefirst.co.uk
Roxy also spoke about how she had to re‑discover herself outside of Leyla Harding. Rather than rushing into a new role or returning immediately to acting, she took time to reflect, recharge, and seek balance. Long walks with her dog, Mr Cooper, became a space for breathing, thinking, and finding peace amid what she described as one of the most difficult transitions of her life. femalefirst.co.uk
One of the key supports in Roxy’s journey was the rediscovery of her passion outside of acting — teaching yoga. She shared that yoga became her anchor during tough times, helping her navigate her emotional shifts and to reconnect with her body, mind, and sense of self. In the months since leaving Emmerdale, she has grown her yoga platform, YogaRox, into a supportive new community — a place where she feels grounded and purposeful. femalefirst.co.uk
This shift has not only helped her recover a sense of self, but also offered her a new creative and emotional outlet. The practice of yoga has allowed Roxy to move through her grief while building something she is genuinely excited about, anchoring her in a new identity that complements her past work rather than replaces it. femalefirst.co.uk
Roxy’s message to fans is one of gratitude and hope. She has repeatedly thanked followers, co‑stars, and well‑wishers for their support during a difficult period, and acknowledged that saying goodbye to Emmerdale meant bidding farewell not just to a character, but to friends and a community she had come to consider family. Roxy’s honesty about her struggle with identity loss has drawn an outpouring of love from fans and former colleagues alike, many of whom expressed support and admiration for her courage in sharing such personal reflections. femalefirst.co.uk
Several co‑stars chimed in with messages of encouragement on social media, celebrating her strength and praising her new direction. These responses show the deep bond forged over years in the Dales, and underline how life on a long‑running soap becomes much more than what viewers see on screen — it becomes a lived experience, a shared journey, and a source of lifelong friendships. femalefirst.co.uk
Roxy’s experience highlights a broader emotional truth about soap actors: the line between character and self can blur when a role has been a daily presence for years. Leaving such a significant part of one’s life doesn’t just change a work schedule — it can challenge a person’s very sense of who they are. Her reflections offer insight into how performers cope with that kind of transition and how new passions and communities can help rebuild identity and purpose. femalefirst.co.uk
Now, as Roxy enters 2026 with a renewed focus on her own well‑being and creative projects, she has framed her journey as one of transformation rather than loss. While Leyla Harding will always be a defining part of her career, Roxy’s path forward — marked by yoga, reflection, and fresh goals — shows a resilience that goes beyond any single role. femalefirst.co.uk
In the end, what Roxy experienced is both deeply personal and universal: when something that defined you for years ends, rediscovering who you are afterward can be one of the hardest — and most rewarding — journeys of all.